The Long Hard Road of Exile
by LibraryGeek007
Summary: Post 4X09: Gwen has left Camelot a broken women. Now she must survive on her own, leaving behind the woman she was and becoming a stronger, harder Gwen. But what she did still haunts and confuses her. Will she discover the truth?
1. Chapter 1

Her hair was much shorter now, barely reaching her shoulders. She'd cut it off shortly after her humiliating departure from Camelot. Although nothing could lift the intense pain and guilt of what had happened, cutting her hair short had lifted her somewhat. It was a change, something that separated her from what and who she was. A new style of clothing was the next thing she was thinking about doing. She couldn't be sweet, kind-hearted Gwen anymore. That had been torn brutally away from her as a result of her own actions. She still couldn't believe what she had done. She had thought her feelings for Lancelot were long gone in the past, but the feelings towards him overcame her so intensely it still astonished and bewildered her. She cringed at that thought. She couldn't think about it, or she'd break down again.

Keeping her eyes firmly on the road ahead, she walked on. She'd managed to sell most of her possessions and then the cart for good prices, so she had enough money to last her a while. Where would she go? There was Mary and John in Longstead, but she knew that news of what she had done would spread fast, and she didn't know if she could bear to see anymore accusing faces. A flash of Arthur crossed her mind. His anger. His disbelief. His disappointment. And Elyan. He wouldn't even talk to her, just gifting her with a disgusted look as he walked out of the council chamber. Only Merlin had come to see her off, but she knew she didn't deserve even that kindness from him.

The light was getting darker, and she knew she would have to find somewhere to camp down for the night. The loneliness of her situation almost overcame her then and there. Another night of the unknown, with no one there to keep watch and protect her. In her bag was everything she had in the world. If it was stolen she'd have nothing.

Finding a small clearing among some hedging she began to settle down for the night. Fearing bandits would spot a fire, she had only a rough blanket for warmth. She stuffed some coins down the sides of her boots, so if she was robbed in the night, at least she'd have some money to keep her going. Her thoughts went back to Merlin. Merlin's mother Hunith lived just outside of Camelot's boundaries. There would be relative safety there, and there would be a good likelihood that word of what had happened wouldn't have reached Ealdor. And with that thought, she drifted asleep.

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><p>She woke to the sound of birdsong above her, and to the grateful knowledge that she had not been robbed while she'd slept. Gathering her things, she continued her journey, this time with a destination in mind. Ealdor was a three day hike away if she kept up the pace. Would Hunith be understanding? Would she turn her away? Perhaps she shouldn't tell her anything at all? Caught up in her thoughts, Gwen only noticed the riders behind before it was too late. There were three of them. Not bandits, for these men were much better dressed. More likely they were slave traders. Gwen inwardly cursed at her foolishness. She should have been keeping watch for anyone to give herself time to get off the road and hide.<p>

"Well, well, well, what have we here? She's a pretty one, under all that dirt. What you think Garth?" He turned to the oldest of the three who looked at her intently. Fear rose in Gwen's chest. There was no doubt in her mind. These men were slave traders, and she was their next product.

Garth smiled, and turned to the others. "She's a beaut. Aren't we lucky?" Jumping off his horse he made his way towards her. Looking around her, she found the others had done the same as Garth.

"Please! I have money!" She inwardly cursed. She sounded so pathetic. She should be strong, and show no fear. "You have no other need of me."

"I'd beg to differ. I have a good few clients that would love to have a woman of your beauty for their…amusement. Grab her."

Suddenly a bag was thrown over her head. Struggling as hard as she could she felt her bag being stripped from her and her hands bound.


	2. Chapter 2

**May I just say a massive thank you to everyone that reviewed and liked my story. I really can't believe it! Haven't written a fan fic in a very long time, but after seeing episode 9 of Merlin I knew I had to do something. I needed to know what would happen to Gwen after she left, and her inside thoughts on what happened. Would she begin to believe foul play was involved in her downfall? How would she change as a person? I needed to know! LOL! This story is ALL about Gwen and her time alone before she returns to Camelot in episode 11 (though I might pop in some brief other character pov's, so give me some thoughts on who you might like).**

**I really hope you keep reading, and enjoy this chapter, which is the beginning of some pretty dark things for Gwen.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Merlin characters or world. Just having some fun ;)**

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><p>The cell was dark. Gwen couldn't see much, apart from a faint amber light coming from behind the small barred window of the door. Her arm was in agony, and she could still feel the white hot heat of the brand <strong>H<strong> they had burned on her skin. Marked as a slave. A brief flicker of hope swept through her that Arthur would come for her just as he always did. But no. Not now. He'll never come for her again. Perhaps she deserved this ending?

Suddenly, the door rattled and was pulled open. "Come on pretty gurl." The guard grabbed her, pulling her up. With the movements of skilled expert, he bound her wrists tight and secure, and led her out of the cell. Blinded by the light, for a moment she had to completely rely on the guard for direction as he practically dragged her through the castle. When they finally came to a stop outside a door, Gwen thought she was imagining it when she smelled the faint scent of lavender. As the door opened she saw in the centre of the room a large bath tub with steaming hot water in it. An old woman was folding sheets beside it humming tunelessly and seemingly unaware that anyone was at the door.

"What is this?"

"Boss wants you all prettied up, pretty gurl. Can't have you stinkin' like a pigs sty for what he has planned for you."

"And _what_, exactly, does he have planned for me?" Whatever it was, it couldn't be good.

"Improve business. Gurl like you on his arm in business meetings can create all the right kind of impressions."

"I thought I was to be sold to the highest bidder?"

"You will in time. Fer now, boss wants you around." Placing a hand on her back he shoved her in the room, with the door closing, and the clicking of a lock sounding behind her.

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><p>The bath was amazing. Back in Camelot she didn't have a bath tub, just a bowl to wash up in. Sometimes she'd head down the lake in the summertime. Not as often now, but back when her and Elyan where children, their father would…no! Gwen stopped herself. She couldn't afford to think of Camelot. It was too painful a subject that would distract her from her main objective. How to get out of here? The old woman, Dora, was almost completely deaf, so Gwen's attempt to discover where she was came to nothing. She had to try and think back to where she was taken. She couldn't be anywhere in Camelot, as both Uther and now Arthur had banned any such practises within the Kingdom. She had been near Ealdor, so perhaps she was somewhere in Cenred's old Kingdom. Since the King had died, leaving no apparent heir, chaos had followed, and the likes of the slave traders she was with now had taken easy opportunity to expand their businesses. Knowing this though, wasn't going to help her escape.<p>

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Dora coming back in carrying a beautiful dress. It was the style of dress that Morgana had used to wear. Silk, in an exquisite shade of deep blue, with intricate embroidery along the edges. It was the dress of a noble woman, and with an intensely sick feeling rising within her, Gwen wanted as far away from that dress as possible.

"You wear." Stated Dora.

"No."

"You _wear_, you _wear_!" Dora spoke more insistently, holding out the dress for Gwen to take.

"Please, I can't. I _won't_!"

"You wear!" And with that, Dora shoved the dress in Gwen's hands, and grabbed the sheet that Gwen was using to dry and cover herself up from her. Now, completely naked, she had no choice but to wear it.

Dora helped Gwen fasten the dress, and then made to work with what was left of her hair. Gwen felt completely exposed in the silk dress, that also made no effort to cover up her new arm brand. Clearly the boss wanted people to know she was a slave, and that she was his slave. From behind her the sound of the door unlocking made Gwen turn around. The guard from before was standing there, looking at her with both amusement and surprise. "Come pretty gurl. Boss wants to see ya now."

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><p>The room smelt of wine and sick. It wasn't really a room though, more like a hall, with tables and chairs scattered around and occupied by similar men to the ones that had first taken her. At the back wall a long table appeared to hold the most extravagant food, and that's were Gwen was led to. In the middle was a man not that much older than her. Better dressed than the others, and quite frankly not as drunk as the others, he held himself with an arrogant superiority, though neither of these things made him handsome. Crooked teeth, balding hair. If it wasn't for his yet unwrinkled skin, Gwen would have thought him far older.<p>

"So this is the girl?" He looked at her intently, and then smirked widely. "Truly you're as beautiful as my men said you were. In fact, I think they didn't do you justice."

She said nothing. She would give this man nothing.

"Come. Sit."

Gwen was dragged around the back of the table, and placed in the seat beside him. "My name is Horis, what is yours?" Running a finger up and down her cheek, he then began to play with her hair. Again she said nothing.

"No name, huh? I shall just have to make one up for you."

"Name away." She spat out.

"She speaks! Such an enchanting voice to go with _such_ an enchanting face. You shall bring me good business."

"And what kind of business is that?"

He chuckled at that. "The slave trade is more profitable than it ever has been before since Cenred died here, and you, my enchanting lady, are about to make me the most prominent trader out there."

"Numbers were never really my thing."

"Ha ha! The lady has humour. I like that. Another fine quality that you must have enchanted good King Arthur with."

Every part of Gwen's body froze. Suddenly, it was as if everything in the room had gone quiet, and it was just her and him.

"The word is that the young King called off his wedding, because his little bride couldn't keep her hands off another man. Banished her, he did. Her description matches yours fully, and where you were picked up fits the story of the banishment." Pressing his mouth against her ear, he whispered, "Your mine now Guinevere."

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><p><strong>Will update as soon as I'm able. Finishing up an assignment at the moment, but the next chapter will be longer than this one.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks again for all the reviews and feedback you have given. This chapter starts off with another characters pov (briefly), so hope you enjoy. I really want to do an Elyan pov, because I so want to like him again, but I keep that off until i see tonights episode 10. Arthur and Merlin pov's will come, but I'm not sure when. Sorry for the delay, but as I explained at the end of chapter 2, I had a big assignment that needed my attention more. **

**Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

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><p>"Why bother my lady? Guinevere has been banished! She is but a shadow of what she once was, surely no threat now."<p>

"My visions of her as Queen come to me even in my waking hours now Agravaine. We have merely delayed it." She couldn't let this servant girl win. Not now, when so very soon she would be victorious. "Send your men out, find her, and rip her heart out."

"It shall be done, my lady."

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><p>"Come now Guinevere, why are you making things so hard for yourself? You were once a servant, and my only wish is for you to serve me." He stroked her out of place fingers and crouched down to face her.<p>

"I will not" she gasped painfully, "be your trophy."

"Oh Guinevere, it's so easy to pop your fingers back in, and begin all over again."

Gwen said nothing, but held his stare. Despite all the pain he had inflicted on her she had stayed strong, but her resolve was beginning to crack. She feared he sensed that too.

"You _will_ break my lady," popping back one of her fingers into place, "and you _will_ serve me." He then went on to correct all of Gwen's out of place fingers. Bound to a chair, Gwen could do nothing but scream as the shooting pain went through her hands. Grabbing the part of her arm with his brand burned on it, he traced around it with his knife. "You see this? You feel this? This means your mine…"

"I'm _no_ one's!" She managed to spit out.

"Your mine." he whispered, looking her straight in the eyes, he smiled. "He's not coming for you. Is that what you're holding out for?" He laughed when he saw the tears stream down her face. "He banished you Guinevere, because you couldn't keep your hands to yourself. You weren't satisfied with only a King…"

"Shut up!"

"Ha ha, you see my enchanting lady, you have doomed yourself. You are _nothing_! No one wants you. No one came after you to help…"

"Stop it!"

"…No one has come searching for you. You are all alone in this world."

"No…" she sobbed.

"Yes! No one cares, because you're worthless to them. But not to me." Cupping her cheek almost tenderly "Let me make you into something useful."

"Yes." She barely whispered, if only to make him stop. Horis broke in a toothy grin. He thought he'd won. He was right though, she was nothing. She couldn't even be loyal to the man she loved. The man she had been about to marry.

"That's my girl." Rising he went round the back of her and placed his hands on her shoulders. "You will serve me well, but in case you ever forget that, here's a little something to make you remember." And with that, he grabbed her left shoulder, and with a practised move, dislocated it, and without a hesitation, pulled it back in. Gwen had never experienced pain like it, and as the cell door closed behind him, she sobbed loudly, without caring who would hear.

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><p>Pouring wine into one of the men's tankards, Gwen cringed slightly at the strain on her fingers. One of Horis's many little reminders to never cross him. Despite this, she still planned to escape, though it would have to be well timed and well thought through. If Horis caught her, he would kill her.<p>

"More wine, enchanting lady! More wine!" Making her way to his table, she topped up everyone's tankards and quickly tried to leave. Grabbing her arm, Horis pulled her onto his lap. "Don't leave so soon, I want you to meet my best client."

"She's a looker Horis. Where'd ya pick her up from?" A stout man, with bad skin, and even worst breath asked.

"Camelot, my friend. You are looking at King Arthur's cast-away bride." Pain and rage grew within her, but she remained silent.

"Is that so?" His weedy eyes widened. "Lucky man you are. As they say, one man's rubbish is another man's gold." Laughing they continued drinking, with Horis's arm never letting her go. Playing her part well, she smiled and joined in their laughter, when really she'd like to see them drown in their own wine. Clutching her more tightly when she tried to get up, Gwen had no choice but to stay seated on his lap.

Smiling brightly, she tried a different tactic. "What about I get you two men something to eat?"

"How very thoughtful my lady," tightening his grip around her waist, "maybe that tactic will work later, when I'm considerably more drunk." Kissing her full square on the lips, Gwen had no choice but to sit there and attempt not to throw up, while she waited for his hands to slacken. How far she had fallen, and in this moment, she didn't think of Arthur for once. Instead, she thought of her father, and how much she longed to be in his arms, with his soft voice telling her it was going to be alright.

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><p><em>She was by the stream. Elyan was there. They were both a lot younger, and they were laughing because Elyan was wet all over after slipping and falling in. He kept trying to pull her in too, but she was too fast for him. Hearing her name being called, she turned to see her father. Smiling at them both, he didn't seem angry at all that Elyan had managed to ruin his best clothes. With his arms opened wide, they both ran to their father and hugged him. "Come on you two. It's time to be heading home." <em>

"_But Gwen can't come home dad." Elyan said. Turning to face her, he held an accusing finger at her, "She's banished!"_

"_No I'm not! Please, let me come home. Dad, please!"_

"_On pain of death if you return." Elyan continued to speak, but it was no longer his voice. It was Arthur's. Reaching out towards her dad, he seemed to get farther and farther away…_

"DAD!" she yelled out as she woke. Her face was wet from tears that had fallen in her sleep. It had been the fourth night in a row since her dreams had started. Always the same. Her and Elyan as children, her father embracing them, and Elyan's accusing face telling her she couldn't come home with them. Her thoughts lingered on Elyan, and the look he gave her in the council chambers. A look that told her she would have no support from him. She understood, of course she understood. What she had done was unforgiveable, and he was one of Arthur's knights, so his loyalty was to the King. But he was her brother, whom she had stood by through everything, no matter what he did, how much he had infuriated her, she'd been there for him. And he hadn't even graced her with a goodbye. Did she have a right to feel betrayed? She did not know. Slipping into another elaborate gown, courtesy of Horis, she waited for Dora to come and arrange her hair, before her days duties of pouring mead and wine began.

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><p>"What do you mean you haven't found her?" snarled Morgana.<p>

"She's vanished, my lady. We got her trail a day's ride from Camelot, where she sold her cart, and then we followed a path that we were told she took, but found nothing."

"Bandits?" With any luck they will have finished off the job.

"Perhaps. Or it could be slave traders."

"Arthur has banned such practises."

"True, but the traders have grown rich, and more greedy since Cenred fell. It would not be completely unlikely for them to venture this far."

"Find her Agravaine. I don't care how."

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><p><strong>I know things haven't gone well for Gwen, but trust me, things about to change. Enjoy tonights episode :)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Big thanks to everyone that has read and reviewed this story so far. I do have a plan, and I know exactly where I'm going with this, so hopefully you'll stick with me. Sorry tht it took so long to up-date, one moment it was saturday, the next its thursday. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Gwen the badass is about to be born.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>"I'm sorry my lord, but she's gone. Her trail has run cold."<p>

"There's always a trail Leon. She would have had no need to hide it."

"I know you don't want to admit this sire, but…"

"I just want to know that she's safe. No more. Find that trail. Take Percival and Gwaine."

"Elyan?"

"No. I know he's loyal to me and the Kingdom, but no matter what happened, she is _his_ sister. I'd rather not test his loyalty right now. Put him in charge of the southern patrol."

"Yes my lord." Bowing, Sir Leon left the room.

Arthur was nervous. In fact, he was more than that. He was terrified. Terrified that he had sent Guinevere out to her death with no protection. Sir Leon wasn't saying it, but bandits or slave traders could very well be the reason that she had left no trail, and he felt sick to the stomach. What else could he have done? The council wanted her head, and he couldn't be seen to be taken for a fool. He had given her the best chance with banishment, allowing her to make a new life for herself somewhere else. She had made her choice when she had met with Lancelot that night. Feeling sick again, he turned his mind away to other matters, though no matter what he did, his thoughts always came back to her.

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><p>She hated the way he looked at her, his gaze lingering on every part of her body that wasn't her face. He wanted her for sure, but he hadn't acted upon it. Yet. For a month now, Gwen had played her part for him without a hesitation or mistake. The perfect slave, with only her masters needs in mind. She hoped that it appeared that way, but Horis was clever and perhaps wouldn't be completely taken in with her new apparent loyalty to him. Even knowing this, she knew she had to act soon, before anything did happen from Horis's side. The plan was simple. Horis held all the keys to every part of this castle in his chambers, and Gwen needed the one for the side-door. It wasn't as heavily guarded, and it was closer to the forest for her to make her get away. She already had managed to gather other clothes from the wash room, and had concealed them by sewing them discreetly within the dresses Horis made her wear. She smiled. Her father may have taught her many skills, but it was her mother's that was about to save her life from slavery. Now all she had to do was enact her plan, and it had to be the right moment, when Horis was as far away from his chambers as possible. And that time was now. Walking towards Horis she made sure to pretend not to notice a bag on the floor. Tripping over, the jug she held went spilling over the front of his clothes.<p>

"I'm so sorry sir. Please, let me help you." Dabbing a cloth over his shirt, she fussed over him, muttering continued apologies. "No, that's going to stain for sure. You'll have to change immediately."

Snapping him out of his thoughts, for he seemed to be enjoying her touch, he replied, "Yes, your right." Following behind him, she apologised again.

"I have another." He grunted. "Now get back to serving the men."

"But sir, I'll have to take your clothes immediately to the wash room once you take them off."

He grunted again, but did not dismiss her. Excitement grabbed her. Her plan was working, and soon the key and freedom would be hers.

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><p>Elyan knew why he had been sent on the southern patrol. Even though he had been given command of it, something that he had not been entrusted with before, he knew that it was just a ploy to get him out of the way. And it wasn't because of the ghost possession that had happened a week ago, either. It was Gwen. Arthur was looking for Gwen. Not to bring her back to Camelot, but instead to check on her. Gwaine had a big mouth that always seemed to reveal too much when he got drunk. Elyan should have been glad of the news and that at least there was some effort being made to check on his sister's safety. But he wasn't. She should never have been banished in the first place! He had been angry and hugely disappointed in her. How could she have done that? To Arthur, Camelot and to herself? Gwen, who spoke of honesty, loyalty, of always doing the right thing, and yet she had succumbed so easily. Oh, he was mad at her, which was why he hadn't even been able to say goodbye. A decision that he now completely regretted. Gwen may have done something unthinkable, but she was still his little sister, and like Gwen had done to him in the past, he should have stood by her. Father would be so disappointed in him.<p>

He knew that Arthur didn't want to test his loyalties, by sending him on the patrol to find Gwen, but Elyan's loyalties were already in motion. As soon as he got back to Camelot, he was packing his bags and following his sister into exile.

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><p>She waited till he was behind the screen to change, and she jumped into action. Making sounds as she fussed what clothes to bring over to him, she cast her search for the keys. They could be anywhere.<p>

"Where's my shirt?" he barked.

"It's coming sir." Grabbing any old shirt, she draped it across the screen and continued her search for the keys.

"Get me my other belt."

"Where do you keep it?"

"The drawer beside my bed."

Of course! Beside the bed. How could she have not thought of that? Opening the drawer, she found his belt and several sets of keys. Grabbing the one with red material attached, that symbolised the eastern side doors, she placed it into the hidden pocket she had created. Handing Horis his belt, she picked up his stained clothes, and made for the door.

"What do you think you are doing?"

Turning around, she placed the most innocent look on her face. "I'm taking these to the wash room sir. I'll have to be quick, if you want these stains to come out."

"I never liked that shirt anyway." Walking steadily towards her, Gwen began to panic.

"I'm needed in the hall sir, so the sooner I get these in the wash, the sooner I can return there."

Closing the gap between them, he took the clothes from her hands, and threw them aside. Taking hold of her waist, he put his lips to her ear. "My enchanting lady, you willingness to help is most welcome. As is your body." Roughly kissing her neck, Gwen could do nothing as he held her firmly in place, and hoped that he wouldn't feel the keys in her pocket.

"Please sir. Don't…" Kissing her fully on the mouth, Gwen tried not to be sick. Struggling to get out of his grip, he pushed her against the wall.

"Don't struggle my lady. You'll only make this worst for yourself. Arthur has missed out leaving you unspoiled." Grinning, he continued kissing her. Letting go of one of her arms, he began undo his trousers, and pull up her dress. Gwen knew she should be panicking, but suddenly everything was crystal clear. Feeling along his waist, she grabbed the handle of his small dagger, and looking him squarely in the eyes, she plunged it with all her strength into his neck.

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><p><strong>Next time: Gwen escapes, and makes a discovery in the woods. Whatwho could it be?**

**(Would really appreciate some feedback on my Elyan pov. He didn't come very naturally to me, and I hope that he came off ok.)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hw excited are you about episode 11? Hope that this will help move time along tonight. Again, thanks for the reviews. Someone wanted me to write Gwen turning evil against Arthur. Not going to happen in this story, but I have a few ideas in mind for a story like that, so if anyone wants that, I'll get started on that after this story has ended.**

**Enjoy!**

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><p>Gwen had never seen so much blood in her life. He hadn't made much of a sound when he died, just a gurgling sound as he drowned in his own blood. Her hands were covered, as was her dress, but all Gwen could do was sit on the floor looking at him. She was waiting for the guilt to set in, she thought. But that never came. She just felt a big, empty nothing.<p>

Hearing movement outside, she realised that if she was caught with his dead body any hopes of getting out of this hellhole would die. They would rip her apart for what she had done. Grabbing his legs she managed to drag his body behind the screen he had just minutes ago been dressing behind. Trying her best to mop up the blood proved fruitless, and she instead placed a carpet from beside his bed to cover up some of it. Spotting a wash basin, she began to clean off the blood, though it had begun to dry and stain her skin. Pulling off her dress she ripped the shirt and trousers that had been sewn underneath and dressed quickly. Now all she had to do was get past the guards. Seeing the candles in the corner of her eye, she set the curtains, bed and dress on fire. Throwing wine over Horis's lifeless body, she threw one of the lit candles on him, and grabbing the keys she made for the door. Running down the corridor she yelled to the guards nearby.

"HELP! HELP! PLEASE HELP!" Running towards her she continued. "He was drunk," she sobbed, "and he fell into the candles. He's on fire. So is the room. Please help him!" With that they were off as fast as they could, calling for more help as they went. Slipping down another corridor, Gwen almost smiled, and then was off running as fast as she could. Anyone that questioned her was told the same story of the fire, and making it to the side door was laughably easy. Putting the key into the lock she began to turn when she felt something cold and sharp on her chest.

"Eh, pretty gurl. What do ya think you're doing?"

Turning, she saw the guard from the cells. His sword was drawn, and pointing straight at her heart.

"There was a fire. In the boss's chambers. I'm going to fetch water."

"No."

"No?"

"No you're not fetching water. You're escaping. I'm guessing you started that fire. Good way to distract everyone. Clever little thing you are."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just trying to help, and you're wasting time! Let me go!"

"_Don't _dismiss me for stupid pretty gurl! You've got your escape clothes on." Leaning the sword into her harder, he grinned. "Always wondered what it would be like to have a royal. And you have quite a reputation gurlie."

And with that Gwen snapped. "I am NOT a ROYAL!" With all her might she kicked him full force between his legs, catching him by complete surprise, and as he doubled over she kicked the sword from his hand, and taking it as her own finished unlocking the door and ran for the woods. So caught up in her escape, she didn't notice a small group of men with the proud golden dragon embroidered on their red capes, coming towards the castle.

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><p>Gwaine hoped she wasn't in there. No matter what Gwen had done, she was still a friend who had shown great kindness to him in the past, and didn't deserve to be reduced to slavery. If she was in there, they'd get her out, and then Gwaine had a few questions he liked to ask Guinevere. He thought Lancelot's return was all a little too convenient, and he felt like the only bloody one who thought that! One name sprung to mind, and that was Morgana. No doubt, she was behind this somehow.<p>

"Gwaine, stop day-dreaming and get over here." Leon beckoned him over. "Now we're just enquiring about Gwen. If it gets rough, you both know what to do." Gwaine and Percival both nod, and they leave their horses and make for the front door, but before they can even knock it, all hell broke loose around them.

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><p>She ran. Not looking back, she just kept running straight ahead, jumping logs, roots and stones in her way, clawed by tree branches in her way, nothing stopped her from running. She'd done it! All by herself, with no one around to help her, she had saved herself. Seeing a stream she changed her direction, and knelt beside it. Scooping up water in her hands, she drank. It wasn't until her third scoopful that she noticed the taste of the water. It had a metallic taste to it, and she realised that some of the blood on her hands still hadn't come off. She laughed, and began rubbing it out, though it proved to be a difficult task. Desperation kicked in and she began to rub harder and harder, and her laughter turned to heavy sobs reverberating throughout her whole body. And she couldn't stop. She felt Arthur's intense anger and anguish at her betrayal, the disappointment of her brother and Merlin, having to leave Camelot, being captured and tortured by Horis, and then the deadly blow she gave him. Lying down she cried for what seemed like hours.<p>

"There there sweetheart, let it all out." Looking up she saw her father, smiling down on her.

"Dad? Your, your…"

"I'm here Gwen. Come here." And she fell into his arms, and told him everything. "I'm a terrible person dad. I deserve this."

"No Gwen, never think that." Taking her head into his hands, "Never think that sweetheart. You're the most sweet and kind hearted girl I know. I am _so_ proud of you. Just like your mother is."

"I miss you dad."

"We'll be together again, but for now Gwen, you have to live your life. You're destined for great things, as is your brother."

"I don't want you to go."

"Your mother and I will always be with you."

Opening her eyes, Gwen shot up. Her dad was here, he was alive. Uther hadn't killed him at all, he had got away! But looking around and seeing no sign of him, she realised that she had dreamed him. Her eyes were sore from when she must have cried herself to sleep, and her head pounded. Sadness swept her again, and she knew that she was completely alone in the world. Then out of the cornor of her eye she spotted something that was out of place. Snow drops! They had been her mother's favourite flower, and every time they were in season she has collected a jar full of them. These Snow Drops were beautiful, and also completely out of season. Moving closer to them she saw that there wasn't just a small patch of them, but instead, they seemed to mark out a path in between the trees. Smiling and knowing that her parents were with her, Gwen gathered her strength and followed the path of the snow drops which lead her to a small clearing where some sort of dwelling in the side of a rock face was. Perhaps she had been lead to someone who could help her, and cautiously she approached the door and knocked. When no one answered, curiosity got the better of her, and she gently opened the door. There was nothing to say who lived in this place, just some pots and pans, a bed and table. There were still some embers glowing, which meant that someone had been there recently. Looking further in, Gwen studied the shelves, and panic began to creep in. Toad feet, newt's eyes, not normal things that people kept. A sorceress lived here, she concluded. Moving as fast as she could Gwen made for the door only to hear movement and voices from outside. Silently cursing, Gwen headed back to the shelves, and hid in the corner behind one.

"You tell me that your mission is to please me, but I'm not pleased Aggravaine." Gwen's eyes widened. Morgana! And Lord Aggravaine? It couldn't be Arthur's uncle, could it? "Not only haven't you found her, you haven't even found her trail!"

"Forgive me my lady." It was him. He was the traitor, and he had tried to frame Gaius for it. Merlin was right. "We've looked everywhere, but she's gone."

"She's not gone! She's out there, and it is your job to find her."

"I'll look harder my lady."

"Good." Morgana moved towards the fire, and by just looking at it the flames leaped higher. Gwen almost gave herself away by gasping, but Morgana had begun to talk. "How is everyone in Camelot these days?"

"Arthur stills mourns for her. Even has a search party out looking for her. To ensure that she's safely made it to the border."

Morgana laughed. "How sweet of him, gallant and noble even when his beloved has betrayed him. And while he mourns for his precious Gwen, we'll catch him completely unawares."

"Your plan is working out very well my lady."

"Isn't it just? It's amazing how a simple little love spell can cause so much damage. Not even the meddling Merlin knew that his dear friend Gwen was enchanted," Gwen covered her mouth with her hands to prevent her from screaming, "not even Gwen herself. Both her and Arthur will die believing her betrayal. How poetic?"

They continued to talk, but Gwen wasn't listening. She had been enchanted. She wasn't acting on her own will with Lancelot, she had been enchanted! This was why she had been lead here. To discover the truth, that she was just part of some big master plan of Morgana's. And Gwen wanted revenge.

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><p><strong>All is revealed then. What will Gwen do? What has become of the knights? Stay tuned. <strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello everyone, hope you had a lovely christmas and a happy new year. Sorry for the massive delay, been busy, plus I'm slight annoyed at the writers/producers for not properly resolving arthur and gwen. Maybe Gwen's innocence will be revealed in the fifth series, but it felt that there was a perfect moment when Gwen faced off with Morgana in the final episode. Just all a bit rushed. Does anyone feel the same? Anyway, here's the next installment, hope you like.**

**LibraryGeek007**

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><p>Through the gates of Camelot, three knights rode in. Their red cloaks long discarded and forgotten, they made their way quickly to the entrance of the palace and dismounted. Running up the stairs they made their way to the council chambers to report back to the king. Yes, they had news of Gwen, but it wasn't good. Walking in, they saw the king surrounded by several advisors, Lord Agravaine being one of them.<p>

"My Lord," Leon spoke, and all three of them bowed, "we bring you news."

The king, seeing the look on Sir Leon's face, knew instantly that this was not something to be spoken of in front of anyone else. "You may leave now." He said dismissing the others, though Agravaine lingered. "You too Agravaine."

When they were alone, the king looked expectedly at them. "Well?"

Suddenly, Leon didn't know whether he wanted to be the bearer of bad news, and turned to his fellow knights for help. None of them met his gaze. They all knew the impact Guinevere's betrayal had made on the king, and now they were bringing Arthur exactly the kind of news he didn't want to hear. Despite all that had happened between them, the king stilled loved her, and wanted her safety assured. Turning back towards the king, he knew it was up to him to inform him of Gwen's uncertain fate.

"We believe we managed to track her down my lord, but…"

Arthur sat up straighter.

"But what?"

"It's not news of her safety we bring sire." Stepped in Percival. "We heard rumours that the infamous slave-trader Horis had been pushing further and further afield. Taking slaves closer and closer towards Camelot."

"And you believe that Gwen has been taken." The King looked them all squarely in the eye, they nodded.

"My Lord, we heard stories that Horis's men had captured a woman on the border of Camelot, a women of incredible beauty and grace. A woman that he claimed to be Guinevere herself."

Arthur whitened, but his face remained neutral. "And what did he do with this woman?"

"He kept her as a trophy, sire. Probably to boost his standing among the other traders. He called her…" suddenly Percival broke off, and looked quickly to the ground.

"What?" Arthur's tone was harsh and he spoke through gritted teeth.

"King Arthur's cast off bride." Gwaine spoke up. "Naturally, we followed up the stories and went to pay this Horis a visit and found complete chaos. A fire had started, and Horis was dead, with the girl completely gone."

"Gone?"

"Gone, my lord. Seems like the girl, whether she was Gwen or not, killed him. Stabbed him in the neck and set him on fire to cover it up and cause a distraction…"

"Then it isn't Gwen. It can't be." Arthur stood up. "She would never do something like that."

"We never thought she could do a lot of things." Gwaine blurted out, and instantly regretted it.

Arthur looked thunderous, and quickly Leon stepped in, quickly throwing Gwaine an annoyed look, "We searched the area, but found very little. We can head back with more men. If it was Gwen, then she'll probably be in the woods, heading for running water to cover her tracks. She's smart that way."

"Do what it takes Leon. Just find her."

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><p>There was something very liberating about trousers, thought Gwen, as she climbed swiftly up a tree. Dresses could be so restrictive, especially when it came to escaping. Managing to slip in among the leaves, she was concealed from the passing by Camelot patrol. They were looking for her. Arthur was looking for her. A part of her was relieved that he still must love her if he was sending patrols out searching for her. She was innocent, she knew that now. She could let them find her, and she could go back and tell him what she had discovered. All would be forgiven, and they would be together again. It was a part of her, a few months ago, that Gwen would have instantly followed as instinct. Not now though. Morgana's revelation had brought out another part in Gwen, something that she had never given into, not even when her father was killed by Uther. Back then, she had had friends that had surrounded and comforted her, but out here she had no one. Gwen had only herself now, and she wanted revenge, and her revenge wasn't going to happen if she ran back to Arthur. Morgana had stripped her not only of Arthur and her home, but the respect and trust of everyone in Camelot, even Merlin's. It wasn't just Morgana though, that she was angry with, but Arthur too. How <em>could<em> he have thought she had done that? So many people before had been possessed or enchanted, that wouldn't it have seemed like a more logical explanation that she wasn't acting under her own influence? She knew that there was a history between Lancelot and herself, but that's all it was. History. How could her own brother stand-by and not speak up for her character? She had been abandoned in her hour of greatest need, sent away to a hell beyond her worst nightmares. No, Gwen didn't just want revenge on Morgana. She had a very big point to prove, and an insane amount of motivation to make it.

Seeing that the patrol had passed, she silently crept down, and headed in the opposite direction. She had business in the town of Henge-way with a weapons merchant, as it was about time that she had a sword and dagger on her for protection. She was lucky that she had been the daughter of a blacksmith, well-educated in both the creation of weapons and of using them as well. Weapons weren't the only thing in her agenda. Henge-way was a rough place were criminal's flocked to, and very little law and order resided there. The perfect place to gather intelligence on what Morgana was up to, and what her next move might be. If Morgana could have a spy of her own, Gwen would have one too.

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><p>Merlin was worried. More than usual this time. Arthur had taken Gwen's betrayal badly, and he had witnessed it first-hand just how much it had nearly destroyed him, but now the prospect of what could have become to Gwen was sending Arthur over the edge. Merlin too was deeply concerned about his friend, and he hoped that the patrols would find her soon and bring her home. He was sure that Arthur would not send her away again.<p>

"Thinking about Gwen?" Looking up, he saw Gaius sit opposite him and place his dinner down. "The knights will find her." He tried to reassure Merlin.

"I know they will. She's strong, she'll be alright. She's got the knights out there looking for her, as well as Elyan…"

"But…"

"What happens if they don't? What happens if they do? What happens to Arthur and Gwen?"

"That's up to Arthur."

"And not Gwen?"

"Gwen betrayed him. It's up to Arthur to decide if he can forgive."

Standing up, Merlin began to pace the room. He had thought long and hard about what had happened, and things were beginning to not add up.

"Are we so sure that Gwen betrayed him? I mean, Lancelot wasn't Lancelot! What's to say that Gwen wasn't…"

"Herself? You were there Merlin. There was no denying it was Gwen. You have to be dead before you can become a shade."

"Love spells have been used before. Morgana has been trying to destroy Arthur and Gwen for years, who's to say Gwen wasn't enchanted?"

"Then you had better find your evidence."

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><p><strong>Next time: Gwen creates a whole new identity, Merlin begins to re-investigate what happened the day when Lancelot came back to town, and Elyan makes an appearance.<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**It has been so long, that I'm sure most of you have given up on this story. I almost did, but this chapter was to prove to myself that I wasn't going to quite. Gwen deserves to become a bad-ass and get her revenge, and I'm going to allow her.**

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><p>The room smelt of sweat and eggs as she entered through the beaded doorway, seeing what once must have been fine fabrics all tattered, ripped and filthy, hung all over the walls to cover the mould that grew there. She made an effort to stay as close to the centre as possible, her eyes listing every exit strategy she could think off. She would never allow herself to die in a dank, squalid place like this if the deal went south. The man she had come to see sat at the back, eyeing her with a great amount of amusement, and probably envisioning what she would look like with all her clothes removed. He was a fool, but a fool she needed none the less.<p>

"You're the second woman this month to dare an audience with me, though you're much easier on the eyes." His gaze bore through her, and his grin turned into a smirk. "The other one had a crazy look about her. I like women with a more delicate and….gentle nature." He rose from his seat, and came to stand before her. "Your beauty would gain you work in the finest whore houses in the land, and men would pay gladly for you…" raising his hand to stroke her cheek, she acted fast, pulling the small dagger from her belt she positioned the blade, and his eyes widened satisfyingly.

"I am no whore, and if you so much as try to touch me again I will cut your balls off nice and slow." She emphasised the last part, tightening the blades position. "Do we have an understanding?"

"Whatever the lady wants."

Letting him go, she pushed him away from her. "I want to know what the woman before you came for and I want every single detail."

"And what would I get in return She-Wolf!" He spat, his anger colouring his entire face. "Why would I help a bitch that would sooner cut off my balls than fuck me?"

"I will pay you handsomely for everything you tell me."

"It will cost you a great amount to get anything out of me…" She tossed a bag at him which he caught.

"20 gold coins are in that for your trouble, and I have 30 more as soon as you tell me what I want to know."

His look of anger turned to one of greed and amusement, "What is this woman to you that you would pay the Master of a Whore House 50 gold coins for?"

"You're not getting paid for that; just tell me what I want to know."

He was laughing now. "The crazy woman wanted to know the whereabouts of Helios."

"Helios? Who is he?"

"A warrior who bows to no King. They say he has a great army that he hires to anyone willing to pay the right price."

So Morgana was getting herself an army, no doubt to take back Camelot, but why would she have come here of all places?

"Why would she come to you then? How could you possibly know where he would be?"

"Like most warriors, Helios has a strong appetite for fighting, killing, and women."

"Where is he?"

"Last I heard he was on the outskirts of Mercia, heading north. Follow the trail of Whore houses, and you'll find him. I'm sure he'd love to meet you."

"I thank you for your time sir." Tossing him the rest of the money, she turned to leave.

"Wait! Does the She-Wolf not have a name?"

She smiled, and turned back around to face him. "My name is Esmeralda."

"Your name reflects your beauty well, and since you have paid me so handsomely for such little information, I will give you a word of advice."

"Your advice is not wanted." She fired back, and turned to leave.

"Nether the less I will give it She-Wolf." She stood still, though she kept her back to him. "I know many things through my girls. Secrets that could destroy alliances, marriages, and bring down entire kingdoms. Us men are weak when it comes to women, and at a certain point men will tell a woman almost anything. Keep that in mind next time you want information, it will cost you less."

"You're wrong. It would cost me everything." And she left.

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><p>He wasn't going to find her. He'd checked everywhere that he'd thought she would have gone, even Merlin's home village, Ealdor. Gwen was gone, and his failure as a brother was complete. Setting up camp, he lay down and gazed up at the stars through the trees. He knew he couldn't go back to Camelot, but he couldn't go on looking for her without any sort of leads. Perhaps he should stay right here, become a hermit and depend only on himself so that the only person that he would ever disappoint would be himself? No, he would always be a disappointment to Gwen, his father, and even the mother whom he'd hardly ever had the chance to get to know.<p>

"_Elyan! Elyan! Come on, we're almost there. I can hear the river, come on, come on!"_

_He saw Gwen running ahead of him. She was shorter here, a child, with her hair braided at each side of her face. He was trying to keep up, but his legs where too short. "Wait for me Gwen! I'm coming, I'm coming!" But she was gone. _

"_AAAHHHH!" A terrified shriek sounded ahead. "Gwen!" He started running again, trying to follow the sound of her scream, but every time he thought he was near her, more forest opened up._

"_AAAHHHH!" Her scream sounded again._

"_I'm coming Gwen! I'm coming!" He yelled._

"_No! Run home Elyan! Run home!"_

He bolted straight up, which made him dizzy, and having to lie straight back down again. He was panting, like he had actually been running just like in his dream. No, memory. He hadn't had this nightmare in over 12 years, and he knew why he was having it again. Gwen had always protected him, even if it meant sacrificing herself, and now it was his turn to save her.

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><p>It took a good bit of persuading to get the guards to allow him full access into the cells, but eventually after promising them decent food from the palace kitchens for an entire week, Merlin had his chance to further his investigation.<p>

"I want to see both the cells that Guinevere and Lancelot where kept in."

"Suit yourself." The guard led him down the corridor. "Pity the King didn't 'ave the chance to execute the traitor himself, though he shouldn't have sent that girl away." Hope rose within Merlin, perhaps the peoples love for Guinevere still existed. "If it where me, I'd have sent 'er to the whore 'ouse. Good-lookin creature like that shouldn't have gone to waste. She'd 'ave fit in quite nicely there." Perhaps not, thought Merlin.

"This is the girl's one." Merlin entered the cell. It was the same one he had been in before, when he had disguised himself as Dragoon and had faced execution. It was a standard Camelot cell, old hay to sleep on, with damp mould covering the walls that made the place smell old and decayed. He had decided to look here after a search of Gwen's former house had left no clues, and Gwen had taken everything else when she had left.

"Give me your torch." Merlin said. Slowly, he methodically began to look around the cell, searching for something, though he didn't know what. Suddenly, a glint caught the corner of his eye. Following it, he lifted the hay and felt something metal at his fingertips. Picking it up he realised it was a bracelet, made up of what looked like bronze with markings that could only be of the Old Religion.

"Guard, how many prisoners have been in this cell since Guinevere?"

"None. Kings orders."

Merlin smiled. "That's very interesting."

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><p><strong>Hope you liked. I really want Gwen in the series to be become a force to be reckoned with, but the writers really are not doing her justice. Please, series 5, be better than the season 4 finale!<strong>

**LibraryGeek007**


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